One day, when I picked her up after school, she entered the car silently and with no smile at all. Well, this is not her very much. She always enter the car in smile and can not stop talking about what happened in school that day. But on that particular day, she act different. I asked why she looks like having a bad mood. I wonder whether she's sick or something. But she said, No.
"Angeline, my classmate, doesn't want to play with me. And she asked my other girl classmates to stop playing with me too. So I have no friends to play with, while I'm waiting for you to come and pick me up."
She told me about that in a very sad voice and face. I thought: oooh geeezz, this kind of bully has already started among a very young children nowaday. I remember back in my time, almost every 1st grade students get along with their classmates well and play together everyday. And bullies began to start when they grow older such as 5th or 6th grade after they meet more kids in school and trying to make new friends. But now, it seems that it starts early enough among the 1st grade students.
To be honest, this is the first time for me to deal with this. I read a lot and learn from other parents about how to deal with this kind of problem. The conclusion that I got is that we need to teach our kids about self-confidence first. To teach them that they are equal with their other friends, so there's no need to be afraid and you can make friends with everyone. In my daughter's case, I think she's dissapointed to see one of her friends has managed to push other kids to stop playing with her and how they listen to her. She was afraid that this means she will be alone all the time and no one will play with her again unless she follows the rules made up by this Angeline. She thought about what will going to happen with her in school without any friends to play with. School will be fun no more.
I don't want to add more negativities to this anymore. I don't want her to pay hatred with hatred since that will never solve the problems. Instead it will add bitterness into her heart in the future. So I told her that she does not need to feel sad about it all. There will a way out of every problem she has in school and she needs to keep that in mind. In this case, if Angeline stop playing with her and order her other classmates to stop playing with her either, she can always find other friends in school to play with. If she can not play with her classmates, she can always go and meet friends from other classes. In there school, there are five classess for 1st grade students and many of them are her former kindergarten's classmates also. She can go and play with them instead.
She looked surprised with my opinion and started to smile.
"How can I not think of that before?" She said excitedly. "I still can play with Ayumi, Anastasia or Zsezse in Rainbow Class (name of other 1st grader class room). And she said she will absolutely visit them tomorrow. I was happy to see her smile back again. And to add a little relief to her dissapointment before, I asked her to tell this Angeline:
"Hi, Angeline. If you refused to play with me, that is fine. I still have so many friends out there who willing to play with me. You are not my only friend. So, please be nice with your friends."
After that day, she realizes that she still have so many friends outside her class room to be friends with. And teach her how to make new friends too by saying 'hi' first to other kids and introduce herself first and remember to be nice to them. She makes more and more friends right now and knowing that so many new friends to come in the future. So no need to be worry about not having friends in the future anymore.
Good job, my daughter. I love you :)
To be honest, this is the first time for me to deal with this. I read a lot and learn from other parents about how to deal with this kind of problem. The conclusion that I got is that we need to teach our kids about self-confidence first. To teach them that they are equal with their other friends, so there's no need to be afraid and you can make friends with everyone. In my daughter's case, I think she's dissapointed to see one of her friends has managed to push other kids to stop playing with her and how they listen to her. She was afraid that this means she will be alone all the time and no one will play with her again unless she follows the rules made up by this Angeline. She thought about what will going to happen with her in school without any friends to play with. School will be fun no more.
I don't want to add more negativities to this anymore. I don't want her to pay hatred with hatred since that will never solve the problems. Instead it will add bitterness into her heart in the future. So I told her that she does not need to feel sad about it all. There will a way out of every problem she has in school and she needs to keep that in mind. In this case, if Angeline stop playing with her and order her other classmates to stop playing with her either, she can always find other friends in school to play with. If she can not play with her classmates, she can always go and meet friends from other classes. In there school, there are five classess for 1st grade students and many of them are her former kindergarten's classmates also. She can go and play with them instead.
She looked surprised with my opinion and started to smile.
"How can I not think of that before?" She said excitedly. "I still can play with Ayumi, Anastasia or Zsezse in Rainbow Class (name of other 1st grader class room). And she said she will absolutely visit them tomorrow. I was happy to see her smile back again. And to add a little relief to her dissapointment before, I asked her to tell this Angeline:
"Hi, Angeline. If you refused to play with me, that is fine. I still have so many friends out there who willing to play with me. You are not my only friend. So, please be nice with your friends."
After that day, she realizes that she still have so many friends outside her class room to be friends with. And teach her how to make new friends too by saying 'hi' first to other kids and introduce herself first and remember to be nice to them. She makes more and more friends right now and knowing that so many new friends to come in the future. So no need to be worry about not having friends in the future anymore.
Good job, my daughter. I love you :)
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment
I prefer English comments here.
Be nice and keep on topic, okay ^^
Thanks a lot
Come and visit my other blog:
Female Stuffs
~Serendipity~